Girls, You Deserve Better than Mr. Grey

Talk about a hot-topic issue. Why am I even writing this? There have been TONS of articles written about this already, good ones too! But still I am stirred and concerned. Some have tried to dismiss it as not a big deal. Fifty Shades of Grey is just a book, it’s just a movie. But girls, let me tell you, you deserve better than Mr. Grey.

This book and movie are fiction yes, but our minds work in crazy ways. We know in our minds that it’s fiction but yet there’s something in us that wants to believe that this portrayal of what love and relationship is is real. I mean let’s be honest girls; we want a man to want us, to desire us, to know us, to love us. As women we want to feel needed and we get a satisfaction (and feel loved) knowing that someone wants and desires us. I want that! And I’ll be honest with you, there’s a part of me that wants to drink at the well of what Mr. Grey has to offer. It looks good, it can feel so normal and “right”. Why do I have to wait when it’s offered to me right now? And why not read and watch things that allow me to feel those feelings by just relishing them in my mind? After all, I’m not actually doing anything…. Am I? Actually Proverbs tells us that as one thinks in his heart, so is he (Prov 23:7), in other words, we are what we think. Over and over Scripture admonishes us to be careful what we think. Our thinking and feeling are what drives our actions. Don’t be deceived into thinking that you can just read and watch something and it won’t affect you. The Holy Spirit says, “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life” (Gal 6:7-8), and “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace" (Rom 8:5-6).

What I think and feel are not an accurate gauge for what is really right and good. While there’s nothing wrong with desiring relationship and sex (they were after all created by God) we need to look a little further. The truth is that what we really want is to satisfy ourselves, we want our desires to be fulfilled. We want a man to want us for us, not for him. We want someone to love us and to feel loved, and we are willing to give ourselves to receive affection and good feelings. We crave this so much that we are willing to sin to get what we want, and maybe we are willing to be used to have a fleeting grasp on that satisfaction that comes by being wanted, by feeling” loved”. But the truth is that first of all, that’s not love, and second of all, it will never be enough. No matter how much you pursue it, satisfaction from relationships or sex will never satisfy your deepest desires.

Where does lasting satisfaction come from? You were created by God. You are not an object to be used for a man’s pleasure; neither are you a slave to sexual desires. God created sex too, but He created it for a purpose. Satisfaction cannot be found in the “right” guy, in sexual fulfillment, in work, in your children, or in anything else on this earth! We were made for something more, we were made for someONE more. We were made for God, made to be like Him, to reflect Him, to rule the earth as princes and princesses, to be the bride of Christ Himself!

Love is not just a feeling. Love existed before humans were created, before there was sex. Love is a person and His name is Jesus. And while the truth is that we “deserve” nothing because of our sin we were still created with a purpose and we deserve better than what the Devil has to offer. Girls, you deserve better than Mr. Grey. You deserve more than temporary pleasures when you have been offered all the promises of God in Christ. Don't drink at the well of the world, when you have the river of Christ to satisfy you. You have the opportunity to be one with Christ, to be His. He did not die so that you could be a slave, He died so that you could be free. Not free to pursue your own desires (because that actually is slavery) but free to be who He intended you to be. Paul writes in 2 Corinthians, “For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again” (2 Cor 5:14-15). Don't give into the temptation to fill your mind and heart with the fleeting pleasures of sin. There are no happy endings there. We were made for something more, we were made for Him. And He is the only one who will satisfy your heart.

Reading List! (January 31, 2015)

Finished this month:

She is Mine by Stephanie Fast

I had to opportunity to meet Stephanie Fast and hear her share part of her story at a conference two years ago. I have been waiting to read this book for about 9 months (since I heard it was going to be released - and then I had to wait till Christmas to get it!). I read it in one day – it’s not very long, but very riveting! This well-written and moving account draws you into this little girl’s story. It is so awful how cruel human beings can be to others, more incredibly to innocent children! If I had not heard much of the story already I probably would have cried the whole way through! Even so, I cried… The hardship, abuse and cruelty she suffered was unthinkable – and yet God preserved her, rescued her and redeemed her. This book is only the first part of Stephanie’s story – she’s working on a sequel that tells of her life as a teen which is when God really got a hold of her life personally. Can’t wait!

Killing Calvinism by Greg Dutcher

I bought this one almost as soon as I heard about it. I really wish I could have read it 5 years ago, but then it just came out in 2012! This is a book to Calvinists, about Calvinism and if you’re in that camp than this is one you should definitely read! To sum up what this short little book is about, if you believe and love the doctrines of Grace (also known as Calvinism) and you want to see it thrive and be preserved here’s what NOT to do. He writes, “if we don’t live our Calvinism, we might just kill it.” (p. 10). Greg Dutcher is very honest with mistakes he’s made in regards to his attitude and focus when it comes to this area of theology. The truth is that the reason many people are turned off from Calvinism is simply because of the attitude of those who hold to it. “Imagine if the first words that came to mind when people thought of Calvinists were ‘gentle’ and ‘empathetic’ instead of ‘scholarly,’ ‘argumentative,’ and ‘arrogant’.” (p. 99). Are we allowing our belief that God chose us (and not the other way around) to humble us, or do we become proud as if we have some sort of “superior knowledge”? Greg asks, “Do we Reformed folks tend to assume that because we are right on predestination, we are the only ones who can actually be right on everything else? Or can we allow the possibility that God has given genuine wisdom and insight to other kinds of believers from whom we can benefit? Even if they are not Calvinists?” (p. 61, emphasis his).

“I unhesitatingly believe in the sovereignty of God in salvation. Therefore (and thus is only logical), I believe that the Arminian understanding of the sovereignty of God in salvation is wrong. But the question of application is a simple one: can I live with this theological conviction and still not look down on those with whom I disagree?” (p. 84)

Tempted and Tried: Temptation and the Triumph of Christ by Russell D. Moore

This book was so good I read it through twice. In one month. Yup, true story. Really good book! A great exposition of the temptation of Christ with lots of practical application! He discusses the root of what Satan was after in each temptation, how those were real temptations to Jesus and how Satan uses the same ones today to tempt us. He also connects these to the first temptation in Eden, with individuals like Saul and David and with the temptation of Israel in the wilderness (which are set up for us as examples in Scripture). He reminds us of the importance of gratitude (for it’s when we are not thankful that we turn to other things) and humility (the opposite of which is pride which is really resisting God’s authority and rule). May we grow to be more like Jesus even as we are brought through temptations and trials; we can be victorious not because of our own strength, but because of who we are. “You are not what you want. You are who you are. And that’s defined by the Word of God.” (p. 72) This was very encouraging and strengthening, I’d definitely recommend it as you seek to fight temptation and sin in your own life and grow in Christ-likeness.

 “Jesus, through the Holy Spirit, doesn’t just free us from our appetites by crucifying them with him, he also enables us to walk in the freedom of his newness of life.” (p. 94)

“Jesus didn’t come to protect himself. He came for the world. He came for the church. He came for you. He bore your reproach, strapped on your curse, carried your exile. This other-directedness freed Jesus to live out a very different life from the cringing, anxiety-filled lives so many of us carry on.” (p. 113)

“We’re Just Friends” And Other Dating Lies by Chuck Milian

This was a very interesting book – I got it cheap on my Kindle. In this book Mr. Milian has come up with an interesting and seemingly good method of helping bring clarity and health to the area of relationships. While I would probably push the physical boundaries he would allow up a level (or two!) he gives clear guidelines (guardrails) and counsel regarding how you should be interacting at various stages of a relationship. He spends a whole chapter on the importance of honest and open communication and another on how to manage feelings, expectations and thoughts. Both of these areas are CRUCIAL and I very must appreciated his practical counsel. If you want some practical advice on this area of life, this is a good read.

The New Covenant and New Covenant Theology by Fred Zaspel

This is a short little book giving a good overview of New Covenant Theology. This “system” is just a way of understanding the relationship between the covenants in Scripture especially the relationship between the old and new covenants. This system essentially believes that the New Covenant is brought about through Christ and that Christ Himself is the fulfillment of the old. The New Covenant fulfills all the promises of the OT covenants and thus as Hebrews 8 teaches, the old becomes “obsolete” and the new takes its place. While we live under the New Covenant in the present, there is still a fuller completion to come in the future. We have the eternal rest promised, but yet to do not see it fully realized in the present.

The Fear of God – The Soul of Godliness by John Murray

Very short little book (more like a booklet) on the fear of God, but some great reminders of how we should to a degree be afraid of God – He is holy and we are not! We all need more fear of God, we all need to come to see how holy He is, how awesome and perfect. In order to walk before God and be godly you must have a fear, awe and reverence for God.

Currently Reading:

In Light of Eternity (Biography of Leonard Ravenhill) by Mack Tomlinson (note: this is BIG book so my goal is to get through it in two months.)

Additional books I want to read this month:

Counseling the Hard Cases by Stuart Scott, Heath Lambert & others and I might get to this one, we’ll see: The Gospel’s Power & Message by Paul Washer. I’m taking 2 classes this semester so will be busy with class reading and homework, thus my reading list may be shorter for the next 3 months!  

But God, Don't You Want Me to Be Happy?

Life does not go our way.

I’m not even going to use the word “often” because it really doesn’t go the way we think it will at all. Nothing happens the way we thought it would, and while we can sometimes have a general idea of what’s ahead, the circumstances will still surprise us. More often though, there are times when life goes the very opposite of the way we would have desired. Like Job, we also sometimes begin to complain and question what God is doing. I was in this place recently, and here’s what the Lord revealed to me….

But God, don’t You want me to be happy?

“No dear one… at least not if it’s your definition of happy. My child, you do not know for what you ask. You think you ask for what is best and what will bring happiness and joy, but I alone know what is best for you. Your happiness is not MY goal. My glory and conforming you to Christ is MY goal. If your sense of happiness is defined by your expectations than you will live your life disappointed; but if you surrender and trust Me, hold on to both My sovereignty and My goodness you shall have peace and joy that no one can take from you. In this world you will have trouble, but do not fear, for I have overcome the world. I have a purpose and a plan that is bigger than you can see and it is for your good, just not the good that you have in mind. Trust Me dear one, I am good. I love you with a love that is deeper, wider and higher than anything in existence. I have forgiven you your sins, I have made you My child, I have cleansed and purified you and made you righteous. All this was through Christ’s work and none of your own. It is finished and done and you are perfect in Him. There is no spot in you. I delight in you and rejoice over you with singing. I shall never leave you nor forsake you, for I am yours by covenant. Delight in My love and walk in My steps. I am what you need, I am all you need, and I will satisfy you abundantly.” 

But God, don’t You want me to have dreams?

“Oh yes. I have lots of dreams and desires too. Do you want to know what my biggest dream is? It’s that what I desire might be your desire. You see beloved, your dreams come from a heart that is not pure, eyes that are not all-seeing, and a mind that is not all-knowing. Dear one, I know your desires and dreams seem so precious and important, I know that your heart aches with hardship and sorrow, with hurt and disappointment; but there is more that I have for you. I desire for you to desire none upon the earth besides Me. I dream of My glory being displayed in your life; I long for your heart to be fully given to Me. I gave up much for this dream. Actually, I died for it. Christ died that this passion of My heart might be fulfilled, that people could be redeemed from their sin and brought into fellowship with Me. I am the One you desire, I am the creator of all dreams. Beloved, My desire is towards you, will you not put your desire in Me and give Me your dreams?”

But God, don’t You want me to be healthy?

But God, don’t You want me to succeed?

But God, don’t You want me to have a spouse?

But God, don’t You want me to have good things?

“My child… I desire to give you many good things… but while there are many things that you and I can both call good, there is one ultimate good that I desire for you beloved, and that is Me. I am the “good thing” that you long for. If I give you something, is it not good being from My hand? Am I not good? If I withhold something “good” from you, am I not still good? If I did give you many other good things in this world you would not long for the greater good, that is, Me. What you think is good for you would lead to your ruin, it would merely feed your selfishness. So I may often withhold good things from you My child, because I desire for you to have what is eternally good – a heart that is undivided in its love for Me. What is your good is that you walk before Me in faith and obedience, for that is the way of life. Trust Me beloved, for I am good.” 

But God, I thought life with You was supposed to be happy!?!?

“Oh beloved, you are still looking at your life based on your feelings. It is faith you need, not happy feelings. Feelings change and deceive. I never change, I am the same yesterday, today and forever. Shall not I, the Judge of all the earth, do what is right? I am faithful. I will fulfill My purposes through you. I am good and will work all things for your ultimate good – conformity to the image of Christ. No, it’s not easy, but I bore the worst of it for you and made it possible for you to walk at all. And I will walk with you and carry you through. I will never give up on you. I will always forgive you, for you are Mine. Trust Me, not your feelings. Give Me your heart. In My presence is fullness of joy and at My right hand pleasures forevermore.”

While Job questioned, He also held fast to the sovereignty and goodness of God. He said, “Shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?” (Job 2:10) and “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him” (Job 13:15). That last sentence always amazed me. “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” How can you trust a God who could bring you to your death, even a painful one like it appeared to be for Job? Because He is good. Even when we don’t understand, even when it looks impossibly difficult, even when it hurts, we can trust in a God who is sovereign, faithful and good. We must trust Him, for otherwise we shall find ourselves resisting Him.

May we find the grace to surrender to His purposes and rest in His everlasting love. That perfect love that will never let us go.

 “If we could see what God could see (which we never will, because we will never be infinite), we would see millions upon millions of purposes in every action of the Son of God. God is never doing just one thing in what He does with us. He is always doing thousands of things that we cannot see. He never has only one purpose in what He does. He always has thousands of purposes in everything He does… For those who love Him and are called according to His purpose, all of them – all of them! – work together for good.”  – John Piper

Grateful for the Thorn

"My God, I have never thanked You for my thorn! I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorn. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed to You by the path of pain. Show me that my tears have made my rainbow."   - George Matheson

Perhaps you’ve been there. Expectation and hope… then disappointment. Perhaps someone died, perhaps a dream died. Shattered hopes, dashed plans, a broken heart… I could write about mine, but instead I’ll share someone else’s story. I read it and cried because she wrote it for me. But I’m glad that now I too can say that I am grateful for my day of disappointment. More specifically, I’m grateful for a God who doesn’t make mistakes, who doesn’t forget, who has a plan for my life that’s bigger than I can see and who can turn all my mistakes into lessons. Hard lessons yes, but life-changing ones. Man plans, and hopes and has expectations, but only God will never fail. Keep trusting Him, even though it's hard. It's worth it. He's worth it. My feelings may often tell me otherwise, but I know it's true. I hope this encourages you and I pray you will come to be grateful for the thorn in your life. 

I Am Grateful For The Day That Never Was by Brenda Strohbehn

“Any regrets I may have over that which I have lost are swallowed up in relief over that which I have escaped.” ~Unknown

That quotation has been my annual “mantra” on August 9th. However, I take it one step further and use it to realize that it is because of the goodness and wisdom of God that I can view this day in that way.

Some may read what I am about to share and think that I should “be over it by now.” I am.

Some may read what I am about to share and think that I am in some way bitter. I am not.

Some may read what I am about to share and think that I must somehow despise men. I do not. Unh-unh, no way, no how!

I’m going to share it anyhow—but not to prove anything or to defend myself against those whose thinking couldn’t be further from the truth. I share this because somewhere there is a girl, a family member, a coworker, a friend whose life plans just changed, and I want her to know that she’s not the only one, that joy will come again, and that hope will return.

With my wedding plans nearly finalized for my—you guessed it—August 9, 1986 wedding date, I received a call mid-April that changed everything. The wedding was off, and the reality of an uncertain future loomed before me, taunting me with its emptiness and lack of hope. I had cancelled my contract for teaching the following year (and my replacement had already been secured), and there I was, twenty-five years old, with every well-laid-out plan beyond that minute suddenly erased with the giant pink eraser of “there will be no wedding on August 9th.”

Before I continue, I will be transparent and tell you that it hurt deeply, and that for several months, when I looked at what I was “missing out on,” I was bitter, angry, and, quite honestly, a little ticked off. But when I looked at how God used that one single moment in time to change my life—and my heart—I became grateful, encouraged, and comforted. God knew best. The man to whom I was engaged married not long after, and his wife is the perfect match for him. They faithfully serve the Lord together, and the choice to put an abrupt end to our plans—in the long run and in the big picture—was the right one.

When I was finally able to take the blinders off of my view of things, I saw so clearly that I was in love with love, and he and I both deserved more than that. God’s love runs so much deeper than anything we can “muster up” just because we long for marriage.

Sadly, I primarily received the empty platitude from so many people that I had probably even said more than once myself: “God’s got someone better in store for you.”

First of all, just because he chose not to marry you does not make him a bad person. Though many people use that expression to “console” someone who is sad after a breakup, it’s not a great expression. In fact, it’s kind of tacky and lame to attack “the bad guy” or “the bad girl.”

Secondly, maybe God has singleness, not “someone better,” in store for you. But be careful here. Don’t follow my poor example of saying (as I did more than once at that time) that “I’m never going to get married. No one’s going to ever hurt me like that again.” I feel that I can say this because I’m single, but I can generally recognize the woman who is bitter or desperate because she is so verbal about her singleness—and usually in loud and brash ways, accompanied by sarcasm about the subject. I long to go whisper one simple thing to women like that: “Shh.”

Am I tickled pink about not having an earthly life companion? No, I’m not. Am I thrilled to be exactly where God wants me to be at this moment, in this place? You bet I am! Because His way truly is perfect. God didn’t bop Himself upside the head that April morning of my phone call and say, “Oh stink, I forgot all about Brenda.” He knows what’s best for me. He allowed me to learn things that I would never have known otherwise.

So be careful about the “consolation” you give to others:

“It’s good to be single. Think of all the things you couldn’t do if you were married.” “It’s better to not be married than to be married to the wrong person.”

And on the opposite side, when someone becomes engaged:

“Oh, you’ll love married life. Being married is the best thing ever!” “There are so many more ways you can serve as a married couple.”

Instead, we as the body of Christ need to joyfully serve in whatever way—at whatever time—God has for us. Perhaps what we should simply say (and what we should simply teach our children and those in the church pews) is:

“The best thing you can be is what God wants you to be today, in this moment, in this place. His way is perfect.”

When we view life through that lens, we can, with sincerity and a joyful heart, be thankful for the day that never was because it has been a vital part of making us who were are today.

Source: http://www.petalsfromthebasket.com/i-am-grateful-for-the-day-that-never-was/

P.S. If this post resonated with you you might enjoy this song by Danny Gokey "Tell Your Heart To Beat Again": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwJ4atkFeI8 

Reading List! (December 31, 2014)

Happy New Year!!!! As I looked back over the past year I have read a total of 41 books! (Plus I read the whole Bible through in the month of March.) This past month I read some great books – on some of these it was like discovering a treasure mine with not only gold, but some rubies and diamonds thrown in too! I’ve been greatly challenged this month with a number of things – and actually they were very timely for where I’m at right now.

Finished this month:

Robert Chapman: Apostle of Love by Robert Peterson

This was a really inspiring biography of a man who truly sought to live his life for Christ. (Shout-out to my friend Pam who gave me this book – I finally got around to reading it!) Robert C. Chapman was known throughout England (and in many parts of the world) as a man of Christian love. Spurgeon said of him that he was the “saintliest man” he ever knew! Originally from a wealthy English family he gave it all up to be a simple pastor and evangelist. He traveled almost entirely by foot around the country of Ireland preaching and sharing the Gospel, took missionary trips to Spain; he was a good friend, advisor and supporter of George Muller, Hudson Taylor, C.H. Spurgeon and other well-known Christians. He had the gift of encouragement and from his earnest study of the Scripture was also a great teacher and preacher. The genuine love he was able to show and give to even those who despised him was really amazing and it led to many of those scoffers or wayward brethren to repentance and reconciliation.

“Love is first and foremost humble and in the very few writings he left behind he defined love this way: ‘The love we speak of is meek and lowly; behaves itself wisely and edifies; bearing with the foolish and self-conceited, while it shuns their folly’.” (p. 189)

If You Bite & Devour One Another by Alexander Strauch

This book I’m putting on my “Every Christian Must Read” list! Like, really, READ THIS BOOK! Seriously, I really think if more Christians read this book (which is just applying Scripture principles to how we respond and deal with conflict and disagreement) we’d have less conflict, drama and more peace and unity in the church today! I started reading this partway through the above book which was providential because these two books go with each other very well. This book is about handling conflict and having a Biblical and godly attitude and speech and Robert C. Chapman literally lived this (hence his reputation as “Apostle of Love”).

Strauch talks about what it means to handle conflict, how to respond, how act in the Spirit and act in love, gives Scripture and counsel for controlling the tongue, anger and criticism. He gives Biblical text and practical steps for pursuing reconciliation and pursuing peace; he discusses the need to face false teachers and face controversy (doctrinal disagreements between Christians) but emphasizes the need to do so in a manner that is gentle, kind and loving. He reminds us that we are one body with those Christians we disagree with and ought to be pursuing peace and not sowing discord. He gives the classic, but beautiful example of the relationship between George Whitefield and John Wesley – two Christians who strongly disagreed doctrinally, yet they had a great admiration and love for the other. They did manage to work together some and John Wesley preached at George Whitefield’s funeral. What would the universal Church be like if we could learn to live and love like these two men? Ephesians 4:2-3 says, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”

P.S. For a bonus there’s REALLY great appendix on what it means to be in Christ and thus fight sin from a position of victory! Very encouraging!

It was really hard to pick just one quote from this book, but I settled on this one which is the theme of the book: “When conflict arises, our attitudes and behaviors should reflect our new life in Christ given by the Holy Spirit who lives within us. We are to display the fruit of the Spirit and not the works of the flesh. We are to walk in step with the Spirit’s leading. We are to be Spirit-controlled and not flesh-controlled or out-of-control.” (p. 8-9)

Accidental Pharisees by Larry Osborne

This book goes off the former two very well. Sorry to repeat myself, but you also need to READ THIS BOOK! I’m telling you, this month has been a treasure mine – and here’s the diamonds! Most of us would like to think there’s no way we could be like the Pharisees, but it’s actually a lot easier than we think! In this tremendous book Larry Osborne discusses the attitude that makes us “accidental Pharisees” – we have good intentions, we want to please God, but our understanding of what Scripture teaches, our opinions, our lines for what’s pleasing to God and what’s not (even though it’s not explicitly in Scripture) get in the way. We very easily become proud, look down on others, sometimes even others putting down and separating ourselves from those who “compromise”. What is legalism really? Are you sure you’re not guilty of it? Do you think of yourself as a better Christian than someone else because you know more about the Bible than they do? Is your church exclusive, have boundary markers that qualify you as the “right kind” of Christian? These are challenging questions, but one’s we need to face. While it was convicting, it was also encouraging! So I really encourage you to read this book!

3 quotes from this one: (seriously, aren’t you glad I didn’t just pick one?)

“If we fail to understand how spiritually impressive the Pharisees were, we will remain blind to the danger of becoming like them.” (p. 27)

“How is it possible for the Scriptures and obedience to produce Pharisees instead of disciples? It all has to do with how we use the Bible and how we interpret our obedience. Let me explain….” (p. 57, emphasis his)

“Ironically, the more fervently we pursue theological uniformity, the more the Bible takes a back seat, even among people who pride themselves in having the Bible in the navigator’s seat. That’s because the lens of uniformity insists that everyone interpret difficult or controversial Scripture passages exactly the same way. There’s no room for differing opinions, blind spots, or simply being wrong. Those who don’t toe the company line are cast aside.” (p. 146)

Just Do Something by Kevin DeYoung

At first this book didn’t seem to relevant to me since I don’t think I struggle very much with doing things (my personality is fairly pro-active), however, as I was more honest with myself I had to admit that there are still times I am fearful or hesitant to do things because really, as he points out in this book, I don’t really believe God’s got everything under control. I believe that you cannot “miss” God’s plan/best for your life, but sometimes it’s hard to trust Him when you can’t see ahead. And I do at times struggle with trusting God so this book was really good re-enforcement. While God is sovereign we are responsible to more forward in faith and obedience. Kevin writes, “Yes, God has a specific plan for our lives. And yes, we can be assured that He works thinks for our good in Christ Jesus. And yes, looking back we will often be able to trace God’s hand in bringing us to where we are. But while we are free to ask God for wisdom, He does not burden us with the task of discerning His will of direction for our lives ahead of time.” (p. 24) This is SO freeing! Kevin also discusses how to acquire wisdom and how to grow in making God-honoring decisions without agonizing over them. Great read and I highly recommend it!

“Therefore we should be humble in looking to the future because we don’t control it, God does. And we should be hopeful in looking to the future because God controls it, not us.” (p. 47-48)

Think by John Piper (kindle)

This was a really good book about how we as Christians should view the mind and thinking and the pursuit of knowledge. Some view the pursuit of knowledge dangerous as it can lead to pride. But as John Piper says, “We are not safe from pride if we neglect serious thinking and turn away from knowledge. ‘My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge (Hos 4:6)’.” This book is “a plea to embrace serious thinking as a means of knowing and loving God and people. It is a plea to reject either-or thinking when it comes to head and heart, thinking and feeling, reason and faith, theology and doxology, mental labor and the ministry of love.” Right thinking matters, and we must thinking rightly about God and know Him in order to love Him. If you want to love God more the solution is to get to know Him more. And that means study His Word! Do not think you can grow in your love for God if you do not read more in your Bible. He says repeatedly, “our thinking should be wholly engaged to do all it can to awaken and express the heartfelt fullness of treasuring God above all things.”

“…to see reality in the fullness of truth, we must see it in relation to God, who created it, and sustains it, and gives it all it’s properties, relations, and designs. Therefore, we cannot do Christian scholarship if we have no spiritual sense or taste for God – no capacity to apprehend his glory in the things he has made.”

Currently Reading:

She is Mine by Stephanie Fast (autobiography of a Korean War orphan)

Additional books I want to read this month:

Killing Calvinism by Greg Dutcher

Tempted & Tried by Russell Moore

*I’ve also been convicted that I really need to be immersing myself more in Scripture so I’ve made a commitment to be reading my Bible more this year. The goal I’ve set is to read through the Bible chronologically 2 times this year. Hope you are reminded to make THE Book, the first book. J

My Bible reading plan (only I will double up on my days and try to do it twice this year): http://www.esv.org/assets/pdfs/rp.chronological.pdf

If You Don’t Have It, You Don’t Need It

“God has promised to supply our needs. What we don’t have now we don’t need now.”

–Elisabeth Elliot, The Path of Loneliness, p. 128

I love Elisabeth Elliot. Probably no other author has impacted me as much as she. She’s one of the people I admire more than anyone else. Her faith in God, her perseverance through hardship and testimony of God’s goodness continues to amaze me. When her husband Jim Elliot was murdered by the natives he was trying to reach with the Gospel Elisabeth sought to understand what God was doing. She wrote this:

“My questions were not answered, but I wanted to ‘see’ God, to know Him. So I kept on reading the Book, kept trying to apply it to my life, kept bringing my own thinking and conduct under its authority, seeking God’s meaning in every event that touched me, including Jim’s death and other crises. As God had promised, His Word proved true. He instructed me. He kept me. He held me. He showed me all I needed to know for life and godliness, although He did not unfold all I wanted to know for understanding.” (On Asking God Why p. 140-141, italics hers)

In 2 Peter 1:3 it does indeed say “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness”, and in Phil. 4:19 Paul says “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” Yet, sometimes it doesn’t seem like God is keeping this promise.

Our prayers to God are filled with asking Him to supply things we think we need - or else asking Him to change the fact that we need them. In reality however, it may be that we don’t need these things at all! Perhaps what God wants is for us to learn to be content. In 2 Corinthians 12 Paul speaks of a “thorn” in his flesh. It was an affliction of some kind and three times he says he pleaded very specifically with God to remove it. I think perhaps he thought that he rather needed it to be taken away. But God’s response was only this: “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor 12:9). It was as if God was saying, “Paul, I know this thorn is really troubling you and causing you much affliction. I know you think that it would be better if I took it away, but you see, I allowed that thorn into your life for a purpose. You don’t understand now, but someday you will see things more from My perspective and see that actually what you need is for that thorn to remain. Because you see, through your weakness My strength is going to have an opportunity to shine through your life. You may not understand, but until it one day is taken away, My grace is sufficient.” 

Paul accepted this thorny gift from God. While I’m sure he didn’t completely understand, He saw that God’s glory was the most important thing and so he was content. Paul elsewhere writes, “And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work” (2 Cor 9:8).

To be perfectly honest, there are times when I don’t feel like I have “an abundance for every good work”. But truth is not tied to our feelings – or to what we can see with our eyes. There are certainly many legitimate needs. A job to pay the bills and provide for your family, wisdom in making an important decision, help for dealing with a difficult relationship, heath and strength to keep at your work. But again, God promises to supply our EVERY need…. So if you don’t have it right now, maybe there’s something else you need more.  This isn’t just about physical needs either, but also emotional and spiritual needs. We think we need comfort – did you know you already have it in Christ? You just need to look to Him for it. We think we need strength – yet Paul wrote, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Phil 4:13). Of course, this is all much easier said than actually done, but there have been many times in my life that I’ve felt “needy” and instead of turning to Christ to satisfy me I turn to other things. There are various idols we turn to: food (yes chocolate too), entertainment, friends, alcohol, Netflix, you name it. Even exercise can be a way of making ourselves feel better apart from Christ. God’s Word says that He is sufficient for our every need. If you have a need, take it to Him. He promises to fulfill it. And if He doesn’t, than you trust that you don’t really need it. He is enough.

Book Review: Outgrowing the Ingrown Church by C. John Miller

If I take the time write a whole book summary/review you know that I have found either a really good book, or a really bad one. This, is a really good one. This is the 2^nd book I’ve read from Jack Miller (first one was The Heart of A Servant Leader which was also excellent). It is really insightful as it discusses church function, purpose and ministry. But I’ll warn you, it’s rather convicting as well. Jack writes about an unfortunately tendency in churches today – the tendency to be ingrown, that is, focused on internal ministry and life. How many churches are seemingly strong doctrinally and internally, yet have very little to no community involvement, evangelism or outward ministry? Jack sees that “…it is the privilege and duty of each believer to become God’s zealous pacesetter in bringing the lost to Christ by every means available” (p. 57). As Christians we are meant to be active participants in the Great Commission, not passive supporters from the sidelines. We often tend to have “tunnel vision” and focus on internal ministries, maintaining what exists but in the process we end up ignoring Christ’s command to go and make disciples. 

As he discusses what can lead to a church being ingrown he concludes that “the most fundamental lack in the inward-looking congregation is its loss of touch with the motivational power of the divine glory at work in the church and the world” (p. 72). On the flip side, in looking at what qualities consist of a church that is not ingrown he writes, “I’m thinking of regular and thorough meditation on the promises of God, ongoing repentance based on the intense study of Scripture, continual personal and corporate prayer, daring gospel communication and discipling, mobilizing every member’s gifts for Christ’s mission to the world, and each congregation working to plant daughter churches” (p. 19). This is pretty radical when you consider most churches today. It seems to me that many individuals and most churches tend to think they are pretty healthy, when they are in fact missing a whole lot. Also Jack talks about how many times we can think we are preaching the gospel, or think that we are doing ministry when we’re really not.

Jack spends some time talking about how to develop zeal for the gospel, which is essential if you are going to overcome any ingrown tendencies. This zeal springs from faith in the power of God. He goes on to talk about how faith is expectation – it’s expecting God to answer prayer and be at work in our midst. If you don’t have a faith that expects God to move, than you will have little zeal for the Gospel. There is a chapter devoted specifically to corporate prayer and sees this as essential to the health and growth of any church. He writes that he became convinced that “a normal Christian life requires participation in corporate prayer.” Too often, corporate prayer is minimized or nearly excluded from the life of the local church. Very little to no special time is set for prayer and any of that time is mostly focused on internal needs and ministry.

Another tendency of an ingrown church or person is a superior attitude (both in regards to other Christians and to non-believers) and out of that often flows a critical attitude towards others. For this reason Jack emphasizes teaching on and training the tongue. In his sections about discipleship one fragment that he emphasizes is teaching people not to be at all critical of others or unkind. He writes, “If you criticize others in the church, you are really attacking yourself – because we are one body in Christ. Indeed, to attack others with our tongue is really to attack Him, the head of the church” (p. 34). It is so easy for us to tear down other Christians (whether within our local church, or someone else cross country) when we should be pursuing peace and unity and be busy serving Christ. I confess my own tendency in this area - it is easy to criticize others when you don’t agree with them. However, it is one thing to call someone out when they are clearly contradicting Scripture, but it is something else to unjustly criticize others or to tear someone down over some terminology or minor things you don’t agree with. If you have the tendency to look down on and/or criticize others with whom you don’t agree, let this be a warning to you as it is to me.

All this to say, this is an excellent book and one I found very helpful! I hope you'll join me as I pray and seek the Lord for how and where He will have me be more active in the great commission. I’ll quote Jack’s closing remarks to inspire you to pursue and active role in Christ’s call: “So let us go forward with this vision. Let us give it no rest until we see more and more people in our churches changing from merely surviving to working for Christ, becoming His soldiers in the noblest cause this world has ever seen” (p. 173).